#148 — "B" Challenge: Beneath the Dark (2011)

Director: Chad Feehan
Rating: 3/5

This one kind of confused me at first, so bear with me as I try to figure this out. There will be spoilers, because I just can’t seem to find my way around them with confusing movies. It started off with a couple, Paul and Adrienne, on their way to a wedding in Los Angeles. Things got a little steamy in the car, and they almost killed themselves when they ran off the road. Being as tired and horny as they were, they decided to stop for the night. They found a little motel called Roy’s and checked in. The man who ran the place, Frank, was a little strange but he seemed nice enough. He just couldn’t leave Paul alone, though. He kept asking if he needed anything, and following him like a sick puppy trying to help him out. It got creepy quick. Frank was constantly having flashbacks about his rough relationship with his wife, but we weren’t sure were it was going until the very end. The first night Paul, after a little failed sexual encounter with Adrienne, went out to the motel’s cafe for some coffee and pie. Frank was there, and he gave Paul a little unwanted advice about how he should make sure he never loses Adrienne. He left, and another man came in who wanted to talk about God. Paul told him he didn’t believe in that, and the man became angry. Paul returned to his room to find a message for him carved into the bathroom cabinet. It directed him to a certain passage in the bible in the nightstand. In the book, there was a letter for him. We never got to know what the letter said, but it seriously freaked Paul out. When he went to show Adrienne the message in the bathroom, it was gone, as was the letter in the bible. It turned out that the people in the motel knew a little more about Paul than he was comfortable with. After having a shower together, Paul and Adrienne discovered a VHS in the television depicting something horrible that Paul did when he was in college. It truly was a horrible thing, and Adrienne left him after watching it. There was a scuffle between Paul, Frank, and Frank’s wife Sandy out in the parking lot, and Paul suddenly woke up in his room with Adrienne still there. Maybe it was a dream? I’m not really sure about that part. But anyways, she disappeared again, and the man from the diner returned. He explained to Paul that he and Adrienne had actually died in that car crash, and that he was giving him the same opportunity that he’d given Frank. If he could guide the next soul into the “truth” then he would be granted an eternity with Adrienne. However, the next soul arrived (the identity of that soul was the best part of the movie, to me), and Paul really didn’t do much with him before the guide-man told him that he could leave. He said that he’d made the right decision. This is the part that confused me, really. What decision did he make? Where was he going? Did he get to have Adrienne back? What happened next told me no, he did not get Adrienne back, but I hope I’m wrong.

So, what were these people? They were angels, or ghosts, or something like that. The man who gave Paul his new “job” called himself the son of god, though I don’t think he was supposed to be jesus. So I’m really not sure about all that. I’m not sure why he let Paul leave before he really did anything, either. This movie was kind of interesting. It wasn’t scary or even creepy at all, but the characters were very well developed so I was able to get into it. The ending wasn’t great, and it just left me confused. It was more of a religious drama than a horror movie, and the whole religious thing usually doesn’t do much for me. In the end, it was just okay.

#147 — "B" Challenge: Bachelor Party in the Bungalow of the Damned (2008)

Director: Brian Thomson
Rating: 2.5/5

This movie sounded like it had some potential. The trailer definitely looked interesting, and it has one of those titles that always intrigues me. But I think I’ve already seen all of the good b-movies, because I can’t seem to find anymore. A good low budget cheesy horror movie is just about the best thing in the world, in my opinion. But a bad low budget cheesy horror movie? It’s almost painful. This one isn’t quite painful, but it just makes me sad to know that I could have loved it but didn’t. It was about a man named Chuck, who was getting ready to get married. His best friend and best man, Sammy, planned a wild bachelor party for him out in the Hamptons. Along with them, were three of their friends, Paulie, The Fish, and Gordon. Gordon wasn’t really a friend; he was one of those weird guys you just tolerate because they can get you stuff. In this case, it was the bungalow, which belonged to Gordon’s uncle. So they brought him along and tolerated him so they could have a good time. Turns out, that wasn’t such a good idea. After a little bit of drinking, three women showed up. Strippers, hookers, whatever you want to call them. They danced around for the guys for a while, then drugged Chuck. One of the girls took him to the bedroom and started having her way with him. Meanwhile, Paulie and The Fish are getting lucky as well. Gordon didn’t want anything to do with them, and Sammy was just trying to be nice to his friends by giving them the ladies. I had a suspicion that Sammy was gay, but it never really went into that. But anyways, Paulie and The Fish were killed by the ladies and left to rot in their respective bedrooms. I’m not sure what happened to Paulie, because it was pretty quick and didn’t really show it. The Fish was attacked by the woman’s giant man-eating breasts. Yes, I said it: man-eating breasts. Chuck was eventually attacked too, but he didn’t die. He turned into one of them. Oh, I forgot to mention, the girls were vampires, of course.

Sammy didn’t want Chuck to ruin his bachelor party, so he wouldn’t let him call his fiance, Michelle. She had something very important to tell him, though, so she went for a visit. When she got there, her man was already a vampire. So she and Sammy set out to kill the master vampire, in hopes that it would turn Chuck back into his old self. Unfortunately, they were wrong about the identity of the master vampire. The true master vampire was surprising, but it didn’t make sense, so it wasn’t a good surprise. It involved a boy who was horribly humiliated in high school, and his hatred toward his tormentor turning him into a vampire. So, the one who humiliated him happened to be the master vampire, even though he wasn’t a vampire at all. So, in this world, a vampire doesn’t have to bite someone to turn them, though it does still work like that. You can just get so pissed that it kills you and brings you back as a member of the bloodsuckers. Makes perfect sense, right? Okay, spoiler alert. I don’t feel wrong giving this away, and if you watch it, I don’t think you’ll care either. Gordon was the humiliated boy, surprise surprise. Thinking he was actually the master vampire, Sammy went after him. When Gordon explained everything to him, Sammy just thought he was stupid and killed him anyway. When that didn’t work, he realized that Gordon had been telling the truth. Sammy would have to kill himself in order to save Chuck and Michelle (who at that point had also been turned). So he took a bunch of morning after pills and washed them down with alcohol. That didn’t kill him, though. He woke up, fine and dandy Chuck and Michelle, also fine and dandy, by his side.

So you see, the whole movie just doesn’t make sense. It was okay up until that point. It had some funny parts, and it did succeed in keeping me interested. But the ending wasn’t very well thought out, I don’t think. They were trying to be original, I guess, but they overlooked the fact that it just didn’t many any sense at all. That’s why I rated it 2.5. Because I actually enjoyed it up until the end, which ruined it for me. Say Gordon was attacked by a vampire when he ran into the woods, after being humiliated by Sammy. That would make him the master vampire, and all would make sense. Or, if you were set on Sammy being the master, just say that he turned Gordon and just…lost his memory somehow. Or maybe he knew everything, he just didn’t know about the kill-the-master thing. I don’t know, anything would have been better than anger turning someone into a vamp. I mean, come on people! What the hell? So many things have been changed about vampires over the years, but that at least stays the same. A vampire turns someone into a vampire. There’s no way around it. Anyways, overall it was a pretty decent movie. The effects were weird and not that great, the acting was so-so, but it was entertaining. The ending, however, ruined everything. One really awesome thing, though, before I go: Lloyd Kaufman had a cameo as a cross-dresser. Best part of the whole movie.

#146 — "B" Challenge: Boogeyman 2 (2007)

Director: Jeff Betancourt
Rating: 3.5/5

If you’ve seen the first Boogeyman, you know that it was about a man with an intense fear of that monster in the closet. That fear eventually drove him to madness, and he was placed inside a mental facility that specialized in treating phobias. Eventually, he committed suicide in that facility. In this sequel, we follow siblings Henry and Laura. When they were children, they saw their parents get murdered. They were young, so they weren’t quite sure what to think of it. They were both sure that the boogeyman was the culprit. They grew up, and Henry ended up in that same facility. After what I think was three months he was released with a clean bill of health. He planned on moving to San Francisco for a new job, to start over without that fear hanging over his head. Laura, who was thought to be the strong one of the two, was very upset by this. She was constantly having nightmares about the boogeyman. She said that he waited until they were separated, and that she didn’t want him to leave her because she couldn’t do it on her own. Why she couldn’t just move with him, I’m not sure, but she ended up admitting herself into the facility. At first, she was worried that she’d be stuck with a bunch of crazy people, but she learned that they weren’t crazy at all and started making friends. Mark (David Gallagher from the TV show Seventh Heaven; interestingly, the man in the first movie was in that show with him) was terrified of the dark. Paul was a germ-o-phobe. Darren was agoraphobic, meaning he was afraid of the outside world, and people in general. Nikki was afraid of getting fat, so she puked her dinner into a bucket every night. And then there was Allison. She said that she was afraid of “losing control,” so she cut herself. It was something about most people dealing with their problems internally, but that was impossible for her. She cut herself, making the problem external so that she could deal with it. She also said that she was afraid to stop cutting herself, which doesn’t make a lot of sense to me, but I guess some people are like that. Anyways, when her new friends started dying in ways that she alone knew were not accidents, Laura was sure that the boogeyman had followed her. The psychiatrist, Dr. Ryan (Gabrielle from Xena: Warrior Princess) had a little fear of her own: turning out like her schizophrenic mother. But she was a good lady, and she really wanted to help the kids. The doctor, Dr. Allan (Jigsaw, from the Saw series), had an affinity for helping patients who suffered with what he called “boogey-phobia”. He treated Tim (from the first movie), Henry, Laura, and a whole lot of other people. He had sort of unorthodox ways of helping them deal with their fears, though. He locked Henry in a closet and told him he couldn’t come out until he would admit that there was no boogyeman in there. He had to face his fear, dead on, before he would be let out. So, as the kids were picked off one by one, it seemed that the doctor might have been taking things one step further. He was intent on making them face their fears.

Each one of them died in a way that somehow involved what they were afraid of. Mark was killed after panicking when the lights were cut off. Darren, who was afraid to get close to people, had his heart cut out. Mrs. Ryan, who was afraid of being schizophrenic like her mother (staring at the wall and mumbling nonsense), was turned into a mumbling fool. She wasn’t actually murdered, but she was forced to face her fear. The others all died in similar but different ways: they had to face their fears before they were killed. So, of course it was the doctor, right? He had to cure them somehow? But things are hardly ever what they seem. Turned out, Dr. Allan had a fear of his own that he wasn’t quite ready to admit. The movie took a turn, and the killer was somewhat unexpected. The reason behind the killings was a little confusing at first, but once I thought about it, it made some sense. I think it was about facing your fears, and them becoming them. And after that, forcing others to do the same. Or, as the killer said, showing them what they’re really scared of.

It’s been a while since I saw the first movie, but I believe it was actually about the boogeyman: the monster in the closet. This one, though, is more about the fear of the boogeyman rather than the boogeyman himself. Laura was convinced that the boogyeman was killing her friends. She was terrified. But in the end, there was no boogeyman at all, other than the one that walks among us every day: our fellow man. It tells us that we shouldn’t fear the monster in the closet. What we should really be afraid of is each other. We can turn the lights on, and the boogeyman will disappear; but there’s no getting rid of the evil that lives right next door.

Boogeyman 2 was actually pretty good. What I didn’t like was the lack of an actual boogeyman. I mean, that’s false advertisement, isn’t it? Don’t tell me a movie is about the boogeyman when it’s actually about a serial killer. What was supposed to be (or could have been) an eery supernatural horror movie turned into a slasher film. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some slashers. But I like some boogey-people too. I did like the mask the killer wore; it was pretty creepy and neat looking. The gore was pretty good, and the cast did a great job. It had some suspenseful moments, though not very many. So, it was a good movie, but I would have liked to have seen a monster somewhere.

#145 — "B" Challenge: BTK Killer (2005)

Director: Ulli Lommel
Rating: 1.5/5

We just got U-Verse TV, and I happened to stumble upon Fearnet On Demand. My choices for the “B” Challenge were this, or Boogeyman 2. I chose this simply because I have not yet reviewed the first Boogeyman, and now I wish I had just gone ahead and done it. BTK Killer was another shot at delving into the life of real-life serial killer Dennis Rader, aka the BTK Killer. BTK stood for “Bind. Torture. Kill.” If done properly, a movie about him could be pretty scary. But I’ve only seen two, and neither were scary. This one was garbage. In 1974, Wichita, Kansas was rocked by the series of murders committed by Dennis Rader, who was calling himself Bill Thomas Killman. The authorities never could figure out just who he was. He eventually disappeared off the map, and they all thought everything was fine. However, thirty years later, he started up on a killing spree once again. He wrote many letters to the local new station, in hopes of getting a lot of air time. He wanted to end up on national television one day. This movie switches back and forth between 1974 and 2004. Sometimes this kind of thing can work, but here it was annoying. The man who played Dennis in 1974 couldn’t act, and everything he did just looked plain stupid. The older Dennis was a little better, I think, but we didn’t see him as often. Dennis’ letters were directed at the anchorwoman of the local news, Lacy. She was plagued with horrible nightmares of becoming BTK’s next victim, but it never really made clear whether or not he was planning on going after her. BTK Killer was also full of scenes from slaughterhouses. I’m not sure, but it seemed like real footage, and it was absolutely sickening. I hate–I mean, absolutely despise–those things, and I really hope it wasn’t real. But I became really frustrated with this movie when it wouldn’t quit showing me things I really didn’t want to see. Dennis was obsessed with slaughterhouses, and used animals to torture his victims. He brought along a little wicker box that he filled with creatures he hoped would terrify the women: rats, snakes, scorpions, worms, bugs, etc. He always made them eat the creatures. Once he even made a woman eat a bunch of what looked like raw ground beef. He had a problem with the slaughter of animals, and seemed angry that it happened, and that people didn’t seem to care about animals enough. As an animal lover myself, I can understand him there. But I really didn’t seem sincere, but rather just an excuse. That could have been due to the horrible acting, but I can’t be sure. The kill scenes were boring with no flair, and that’s just unacceptable. There was one okay scene, but that was the opening one. It wasn’t great, but it was pretty disgusting. It was the only even slightly disturbing thing the movie had to offer.

Sometimes, I’ll find a movie that is so horrible that I absolutely do not want to finish watching it. But I had a goal to see every horror movie ever made, so I continue. Sadly, this was one of those movies. I kept shouting at it to hurry up and end already, and that’s not a good sign. Okay, let’s look at the flaws.

1)There was hardly any story to it. Okay, that’s a lie. But what little story it had was horrible.
2)The acting was horrible.
3)There were no special effects at all.
4) It was boring.

I can deal with bad acting, trust me. Sometimes I actually like it. I can deal with a movie having little or no special effects. I can’t really deal with a lack of story, but sometimes I can overlook it if the rest is done well. This movie major flaw was the fact that it was boring as hell. This is about a man who would kidnap, bind, torture, and kill women. Torture. But I don’t think this guy tortured them by making them eat rats and bugs. We could watch Fear Factor to see that kind of stuff, and it would be a lot more interesting than this garbage. The other movie I’ve seen about Dennis Rader was called, simply BTK, and it starred Mr. Kane Hodder. It was not scary. It, like, this one, just wanted to tell the story of his life. But unlike this one, BTK starring Kane Hodder, was actually good. So, skip over this one if you’re craving some BTK, and I would recommend going for the other one. My final statement? This movie is a giant pile of shit.

Note: I couldn’t find any photos from the movie, so the above picture is of the real Dennis Rader.

#144 — "B" Challenge: Bread Crumbs (2011)

Director: Mike Nichols
Rating: 2/5

I had pretty high hopes for this. It claims to be a dark twist of the classic Hansel and Gretel story, which it is in a sense. But sadly, it just falls short. It had so much potential, but it didn’t live up to it at all. What we have is a group of porn film makers at a cabin in the middle of the woods. They spent their first night there getting drunk and acting stupid, and planned on getting their movie started the next day. They never got very much filming done, though, because they all started dying off. There were two children out in the woods, and it seemed as if they were the culprits. They were, of course. They were siblings Henry and Patti. Patti was the brains behind the operation, and Henry was the muscle. Patti would hum a creepy little tune to inform Henry of the actors/crew members whereabouts, and he would show up and take them out. They all acted pretty stupidly. One, once they figured out that the kids were trying to kill them, they decided to go to the kids’ house for help. What kind of logic is that? Anyways, Patti says that they live in a house of candy, and that she saw and understood the terrible things that were happening there. I guess “candy” could symbolize temptation in this situation. But I think it means many different things. It could be any of the seven deadly sins. It could be any number of things. The tagline is “we all live in a house of candy.” So I guess we’re all sinners, and it’s up to these two kids to punish us. I’m not quite sure, because it doesn’t get that much into it; it just leaves you to form your own conclusion. One thing that really bothered me was the fact that everyone called Patti and Henry little children. I don’t know how old those actors are exactly, but I would guess they’re around my age (22). They weren’t children at all. I think this movie would have been a whole lot better, and a lot creepier, had they cast actual children. There really is something scary about evil children, but adults pretending to be children? It’s just stupid and annoying. I also didn’t like the lack of an explanation. All the explanation we got was that they lived in a house of candy. That gives us nothing, really. I would have liked more. It was a dark twist on a fairy tale we all know and love, but it failed on so many levels. First of all, it wasn’t scary at all. It wasn’t even creepy, really. The tune that Patti would hum to call Henry was a little spooky, but it wasn’t enough. I hate to see such great potential go to waste, because I believe this movie could have been completely terrifying. Instead, it was boring and disappointing. The ending was stupid, and there was no real suspense leading up to it. Some parts were funny, but sadly, the best character was the first to die. In conclusion…Bread Crumbs was a huge let-down. What I thought would be a scary fairy tale turned out to be a yawn-fest that failed at being even remotely creepy. The killers were a couple of unintelligent 20-somethings pretending to be little children, and it was just poorly thought out. On the drawing board, this probably looked fantastic. But once it was put on film, it failed to be anything other than a one-time view for people who are bored.

#142 — "B" Challenge: Blood Creek (2009)

Director: Joel Schumacher
Rating: 4/5

I was kind of skeptical about watching this, because I assumed that it was going to really focus on government and Nazi history (which is interesting; I just don’t really like political type movies). I was wrong, because all this movie focused on was the dark arts. It started off in the 1930s, when a poverty stricken German family living in Virginia was notified by the Nazis that they would be housing one of their scientists. I wasn’t really sure what he was doing there to begin with, but it became clear soon enough. He seemed like a nice enough guy, though looks do deceive. He was looking for an ancient stone that was said to have been found on the family’s farm. The father of the family let him know that it was, in fact, out in their barn and still in perfect shape. The scientist, Mr. Wirth, went out to investigate the stone, and he found the man’s young daughter crying in the barn because her pet bird had died. He said some sort of incantation, and the bird returned to life. He told the little girl that he could do wonders if he could only gain enough strength. Cut to the present day, and a young paramedic who spent his nights caring for his Alzheimer’s ridden father, and worrying about the disappearance of his brother Victor (who disappeared during a camping trip). One night, out of nowhere, Victor returned to see Evan. Instead of rejoicing in their reunion (or returning to see his wife and children), Victor told Evan to grab some guns and follow him. He took Evan back to the place he had been held captive for the last two years, and he was very intent on getting his revenge on the people who tortured him. It didn’t take very long for them to realize that it wasn’t going to be very easy. The family that had been visited by Mr. Wirth was actually still alive, and still living on their farm. The stone was a powerful occult object that gave Mr. Wirth the power of necromancy. He could kill anything or anyone, and bring them back to life to become his slave: dogs, horses, humans–anything. His goal was to gain a third eye, which was said would grant him power that could not be stopped. It would happen on an eclipse, but he needed blood to complete the ritual–human blood, and lots of it. The family had found a way to contain him for a while, by painting banishing symbols from an ancient Nordic alphabet on all the doors and windows. They kept him in the cellar and fed him so that he wouldn’t become angry. That is where Victor had been for the past two years, trapped in a trailer to feed Mr. Wirth. But when Victor and Evan returned, Mr. Wirth escaped. He enslaved the family’s huge dogs, as well as their horses and one of their captives. I will say that bloody, undead horse intent on killing is pretty damn terrifying. Victor and Evan soon learned that there was only one way to kill him. He needed human blood, but his own blood would poison him. They gathered bones that held the blood of his ancestors and, using Evan as bait, tricked him into drinking it. That, of course, wasn’t exactly enough to stop him. And there were still more like him out there. Liese (the little girl, and Mr. Wirth’s first captive) informs the guys that Hitler actually sent out eight people like Mr. Wirth. They thought that, with the help of these stones, and by achieving immortality, there would be no stopping the “master race.” So, even if they succeeded in killing Mr. Wirth, there would still be others out there who could possibly continue on their mission. The master race could still overpower and control everything. Holocaust 2.0 could still be a possibility. Something about Nazis in general is terrifying. The whole business of the Holocaust, the true story of it, is scary on its own. But to think that the Nazi party could come up with, and actually execute, something like this is downright horrifying.

This movie was actually quite good. The story was unique and I think has the potential to really scare some people. It takes something we already know and fear a little bit, and it multiplies it by 100. Just imagining it makes me shiver. If the Nazis were getting ready for genocide once again, there are a couple of reasons I can think of that I’d be on their list. The reality of it, though far-fetched, is what makes it scary. If you can toss the fact that you know nothing like this could happen…if you can use your imagination, you can picture a modern day Hitler parading through your town, knocking on your door and taking you away. Add to the equation that it’s an undead Hitler who has had years upon years for his anger to grow, and tell me that’s not a terrifying thought. Blood Creek really brings up an interesting question. If he had not been stopped, how far would Herr Hitler have gone to be sure the master race reigned superior?

#141 — "B" Challenge: Big Bad Wolf (2006)

Director: Lance W. Dreesen
Rating: 4/5

The “A” challenge is done, so now I’m moving onto the B’s. I shouldn’t have any problem finding movies starting with this letter, seeing as horror movies like to have the word “bloody” or something like it in the title. I might be surprised, though; who knows? I watched this movie last night on television. I wasn’t expecting too much, since most of the movies I watch on TV really aren’t all that great. However, I was pleasantly surprised at how entertaining Big Bad Wolf was. Everything about it was good; it wasn’t a mind-blowing spectacular entry into the horror genre, but it was definitely very entertaining. First off, we saw a couple of guys out in the woods. What they were doing, I’m not really sure. I think they were in Africa somewhere on a safari. Maybe. But anyways, the two that we saw were talking to the other–who had gotten separated from them–through a walkie talkie. They heard a terrifying roar and went to investigate. One of them is killed, and the other follows shortly afterwards, but not before he has his legs torn off by the strange creature that killed his friend. The third member of the party, Charlie, returned to find his brother leg-less and dead. He shot the creature, but somehow he knew that wasn’t the end of it. Cut to seven years later, and college freshman Derek was getting ready for a trip with a couple of his classmates. He was pledging for a fraternity, and I guess to prove to the popular kids that he was worth it, they were going out to his stepfather’s cabin in the woods for a weekend of fun. There were six kids in all at the cabin: Derek; the popular dipshits, Alex, Jason, Melissa, and Cassie; and Derek’s long-time friend Sam (don’t you dare call her Samantha), a badass biker chick played by Kimberly J. Brown (from Halloweentown, anyone remember that?). So they got to the cabin after driving around in circles for five hours, and they commenced with the partying. Sam was, of course, having a horrible time. She just didn’t like the company, but other than that everything was okay. Alex and Cassie were in the bedroom having their fun; Melissa and Jason were outside having their fun; and Derek and Sam were inside chatting. Everything went wrong, though, when Melissa was attacked by some huge beast. Jason ran for it, and almost made it back into the cabin. Almost. His legs were torn off, just like Derek’s dad. They shut the door on the beast, only for him to come in through the bedroom window and rape Cassie. It killed her and Alex, but Derek and Sam were able to escape. They went back home, safe and sound. They knew that they were not attacked by any normal animal. Sam’s points were these: it walked on two legs, it wore pants, and it could talk. Yep, this werewolf talked to them. And he was funny as hell. He even referenced the Three Little Pigs when trying to break into the cabin. “Little pigs, let me in, or I’ll huff and I’ll puff, and I’ll rip your guts out!” He had all sorts of funny little things to say. Derek and Sam soon began to suspect that Derek’s asshole of a stepfather, Mitch, was actually the werewolf. With a little snooping, a DNA sample, and his uncle Charlie’s telling of the true story of his father’s death, they knew the truth. And they had to stop him.

Like I said, this one was definitely entertaining. Even though the werewolf could talk, it stuck to the typical werewolf formula. Full moon, silver bullets, and things like that. Also, it was a wolf-man, instead of 100% wolf, which I always like. Mitch the man was a complete dick, but Mitch the werewolf was funny as shit. Also, I’ve got to mention Ms. Kimberly J. Brown. I have always been a huge fan of Halloweentown (’cause I’m cool like that), so it was really awesome to see her in this. She was a biker chick, for sure. She had the leather jacket, the nose/lip/tongue piercing, and she was a bad-ass. Everyone was scared of her, and she could definitely take care of herself–and Derek, for that matter. She was just awesome, and I loved it. The story was pretty predictable. I wasn’t really surprised at anything other than how much I enjoyed it. The ending was pretty much what you’d expect from a werewolf movie, but that’s okay. Even with those couple of things, I still think it was done really well. All of the actors did a wonderful job, there was just enough gore to please me, and the creature effects weren’t all that bad either. But what got me was the talking werewolf. I’ve already mentioned it, but I’ll say it again. It wasn’t really the fact that he could talk; it was all about what he said. I think that, if he’d been saying serious things about how he was hungry and wanted to eat them, it would have been seriously stupid. But since he was comical and he made us laugh, it worked. That was the only silly part of the movie, though. The rest played out like a horror movie. Kids get killed, survivors try to get revenge on what killed them, while trying to keep from getting themselves killed in the process. It wasn’t scary, but it was a good movie. Oh, and also: Mitch would start transforming when he got angry or horny. Yes, horny. He was able to control it on normal days, but on the full moon he just couldn’t hold it back. He was a whore, I’ll tell you that much. He raped Cassie earlier on in the movie, and he tried to have a go at Sam too. I can’t really blame him for that, though, considering the way she collected his DNA sample. Anyways, this is some light entertainment that’ll have you giggling. So check it out!